FIRST PROVOCATION: What does getting what you want actually look like? List 8 things you would be, do, and/or have as a result.
Often when we know what we want we fixate on the getting of it rather than the having of it. The problem with this is that we want to capitalize on the power of our subconscious mind, and ‘wanting’ and ‘getting’ do not get the same point across as ‘having’ or ‘enjoying’.
Without the subconscious, making what you want happen in your life is all willpower and conscious determination = exhausting. This is because your conscious mind and will, as powerful as they are (or at least, as they can be), still make up only about 3% of your organism’s entire processing power. The other 97% is sub-conscious or autonomic. (For example, you don’t think about digesting your food, or, normally, about breathing, all your habits become automatic and unconscious, etc.) So when you are trying to accomplish something with your conscious determination and will alone, it’s relatively hard-going. When you are trying to accomplish something with your willpower against the programming of your subconscious, it becomes a task of Sisyphean proportions (trying to use the 3% not only to get it done, but to get it done over and against the other 97%).
This is why we so often fail in our resolutions: it’s not because we are weak-willed, it’s because we’re setting our will up against an opponent that is at least 30 times its size. Get the subconscious on-board and the mountain turns into a mole-hill. In fact the irony is that once the subconscious is on-board, willpower and conscious determination are no longer necessary: the behavior is now relatively automatic, and feels just as natural and instinctive as all the other habits and processes that occur without thought. Employing the power of the subconscious is the difference between having to try to be something, and just instinctively being it: a world of difference.
So in manifesting – in creating or trying to achieve anything – we definitely want to work with the subconscious. But, the subconscious works literally. Extremely literally. So if I say ‘I want a red hat.’, my subconscious says, ‘Okay, she wants a red hat.’ And it uses its resources to make sure that I want it – not that I get or have it, but want it. After awhile, this feels pretty crappy because my desire is not to want it (and to continue wanting it all the days of my life), but to have it. If I really want to get the subconscious on-board with my desire, and to capitalize on its power, I must not impress upon it, “I want a red hat.”, but rather, “I have a brand new red hat that I absolutely love.” Now obviously I don’t yet have the red hat, so I get resistance from my rational brain which says, “B.S. You’re lying.” And it’s true, I am.
But now here is my choice: I can either stay in the good graces of my rational, reasoning mind and focus on the fact that I don’t actually have what I want (in this case the red hat), and not capitalize on the 97% processing power that would make achieving my desire relatively effortless; or I could be more opportunistic about it, ignore the ‘voice of truth and reason’ playing away in my head, and repeat this lie just long enough for my subconscious to believe it – and, thereby, begin to make it happen without the use of my will or ego (“ego” isn’t pejorative here). Choose to do the second. It will be infinitely easier to get what you want. It might look like an act of disloyalty to your logical, rational mind – but then, isn’t it perfectly logical and rational to use the most efficient and effective means to achieve, succeed and create what you want? The choice here isn’t unethical – and it’s not illogical either.
A few rules to know when working with the subconscious mind:
1) Because your subconscious works literally you must make your statement in the present tense, and make it the fulfillment of your desire. Articulate your desire in the future tense (e.g. ‘I will be/do/have such-and-such.’), and from the perspective of your subconscious mind it is to always remain in the future. In short: not ‘I want …’ but ‘I am …’. (Keep articulating the desire until you get to this form of the statement.)
2) Stop fixating on the getting and start fixating on the having – or, even better, on the enjoying. This is what your Manifesting Friendly is prompting you to do here in this response (i.e. ‘What does getting what you want actually look like? List 10 things you would be/do/have as a result.’) When you land on this ‘answer’, let your mind go there, and list all the things that would happen, or that you would be doing or having after you get what you want. Thinking about this puts you in a state of mind where you already have what you want – that’s the golden impression we want to make upon our subconscious mind. The longer you can stay in that state of mind the deeper your impression on the subconscious.
For Example. So in the example, “I want a brand new red hat that I absolutely love.”, my first answer to this response might look something like:
1. I would walk down the street when wearing it with a huge smile on my face.
2. I would no longer be looking for a red hat.
3. It would hang on the wall next to my other hats.
4. I would wear it to the wedding I am going to next month.
5. People would compliment me on the hat and ask where I bought it.
6. A girlfriend would ask to borrow it and I would be anxious about having to lend it to her.
7. I would need to find the perfect red shoes to go with it.
8. I would look forward to occasions and days that I might not have otherwise simply because they were opportunities to wear the hat.
Now for the 3 minutes or 5 minutes or 10 minutes it took me to come up with this list, my mind as been focused on and immersed in the feeling of having the hat – instead of wanting or yearning for it. This is good. Transforming these items into the present tense (e.g. “The red hat search is over!.” instead of “I would no longer be looking for a red hat.”) is better still.
Note how I am not thinking about where or how I will find the hat as this would imply I didn’t already have it.
Note also that you might discover not so pleasant consequences of getting, having or enjoying what is you are saying that you want; for example, guilt, jealousy, competition. These are important to note. They reflect an ambivalence toward your stated desire: part(s) of you do NOT want this thing. How many and which parts? Whose values do you agree with more?
SECOND PROVOCATION: What is the very first thing you will do when you get what you want?
Continuing with my awesome example, as soon as I got my hat I might wear it everywhere, even in my home, for the first 24 hours. I might Skype a friend in Greece and show it to her. I might pick out the perfect outfit to wear with my new hat and make some sort of excuse for a get-together this weekend just so that I’d have somewhere to show it off.
Believe With Certainty. Prepare for Your Good. The Manifesting Friendly then asks me to come up with 3 ways I could prepare myself to take this/these action(s). This is a crucial step in manifesting called preparing for your Good (i.e. preparing for the fulfillment of your desire). It is another way of really impressing upon the subconscious mind the certainty of your statement: your desire fulfilled, in present tense. (e.g. “I be/do/am/have this.”) In preparing for your good you act as if it already happened or at least is as good as done. This is another golden impression to make upon our subconscious mind; it says: ‘This is so about to happen that I have to get ready to receive it right now.’ In my example, I might put a new hook for the hat on my wall, get Skype up and running on my computer – start planning the get-together. I get a good gauge of how ballsy I am with regard to my desire here: how far will I go in planning – will I imagine it all in my head or will I start inviting people and making arrangements?
The aim here is to move you from waiting until you actually get what you want (or at least can see it coming), to preparing for it to be in your life. To prompt and invite you to start planning for and around it, now. Of course I might be disappointed when Sunday afternoon rolls around and I still don’t have my red hat – but, I am going to be disappointed anyway! We think that we can manage our disappointment by managing our expectations. That we will be less disappointed if we don’t actually plan on, or expect what we want to happen. But the reason that we are disappointed is not because we planned on it, but because we wanted it. The truth is that if it doesn’t happen, we are going to be disappointed regardless of whether we went all in or not. Going all in does not increase the risk of disappointment: the risk is in the desire itself. The vulnerability is present as soon as you want it, and really want it. But too bad, you already do.
The only real option to save yourself, or at least to effectively try to save yourself, from disappointment, is to go for it. It could only help. And of course it does. Not least of all by impressing on the subconscious mind not ‘I really want or hope this happens.’ but: ‘This is going to happen. It has to happen. And if it hasn’t already happened, it’s happening right now. I am so certain of it that I am moving forward now.‘ When you convince your subconscious mind of this, that’s when synchronicities (those meaningful, fortuitous, ‘weird’ coincidences) start to happen. And few things are as efficient, effective, and delightful, as these are, in getting us where we want to go.
Extra credit: Go back over the 8 things you listed and take any actions you can to prepare for these to be in your life as well.