FIRST PROVOCATION: What is the WORST thing that could happen if you made the wrong choice (or failed, or didn’t get what you wanted)? (Choose the most appropriate phrasing for your desire, and the way you articulated it.)
If you’ve ever had a session with me, you know that I ask this question a lot: What is the worst thing that could happen?
When we operate out of fear, usually in an effort to avoid facing that fear, we invariably end up right where we don’t want to be: in the dreaded situation. I am being conservative when I tell you that, in my experience, 99.99999% of the time when we make decisions and choices in life out of fear (in an effort to avoid a situation or circumstance) that is precisely where we end up. So the point of this question is three-fold:
1. To get you to simply be aware of what’s motivating you. Are you making choices and decisions based on what you think is most likely to avoid your worst case scenario? or, most likely to procure your best case scenario? They’re not the same thing. It’s the difference between going for what you want, and going for whatever you think will help you avoid what you don’t want. It’s often a world of difference.
2. To shed awareness on what the worst worst worst case scenario is for you: to help you be aware of the root fear. This is why after you answer the first time and open the flap, your Manifesting Friendly asks you the same question again – and again and again. At least 5 times It says. Go for 8. I would keep asking the question until you pass the point where you think the question is totally moronic. Ask two more times after you reach this point. For example, ‘… worst case scenario is that I would die.’ ‘Okay, and what is the worst thing that would happen if I died?’ ‘I’d be dead, my life would be over – duh.’, sounds like a stupid question, but I assure you it isn’t. Push past this point, that is were you are likely to find something really interesting.
3. To get you to realize the ultra, ultra important truth that: in the end, – we would deal. Even with this, the worst possible scenario: either we will die or we will deal. There are no other options. Of course we may not want to deal, and that is totally understandable. But not wanting to, and fearing we won’t be able to, are, for our intents and purposes, universes apart. The object here is not to make us want to face our fear, or to cozy up next to our dreaded scenario. The object is to come to grips with the blunt truth: We would deal. We have to. And, insofar as we still exist, we always do. Now we may not deal well – but that, is up to us. The how we have some say over; the whether – eh, not so much.
This means that should it, our dreaded situation (destitution, poverty, embarrassment, failure, being alone, being a huge disappointment – pick one, pick five!), happen, in some significant sense we would be alright. Either we would be dead, or we would be alright, still chugging along, somehow still making it. We don’t have to run from possible situations with the fear of life in us. If we can get to, ‘it would suck, but I don’t need to orient my entire life and every decision that I make around this possibility.’ it buys us huge relief, and the freedom to make choices and decisions that are more in line with what we actually want to create in our lives.
And remember: because you are virtually (maybe cosmically) guaranteed to end up where you don’t want to be by compulsively trying to avoid it, the real risk is not in choosing to go for it, but in choosing not to. Remember the odds are stacked firmly against you when you try, at any expense, to end up ‘anywhere but there’. Success is not guaranteed when you go for it, but at least failure is not guaranteed either. Your best chance of not ending up exactly where you don’t want to be (your dreaded situation) is to make an effort – your best effort – to create what you want. Use your energy wisely.